About the Groups
It is my honor to help you journey through these challenges to obtain clarity, healing and deep transformation. I will be live, facilitating these group meetings and getting to know each of you individually.
Focusing on your wholeness and recovery is my mission! I bring my certification as a Holistic Wellness Coach with the International Association of Wellness Professionals, my certification in the amazing brain, body based modality of Brainspotting as well as my 20 years as a Clinical Therapist specializing in grief, loss and trauma. Most of all I bring my calling to help you heal and find meaning and purpose out of all the pain you have suffered.
Having been inspired through my own life experience, to create this niche for spiritual women of faith who have been the target of emotional abuse, makes me a woman and a professional coach who gets it.
Characteristics of a Healthy Relationship
We were created and are wired to be in a relationship. In a romantic relationship, each partner must first learn to love themselves in a healthy way. When two separate individuals who are growing find one another and decide they are better together and have the skills and ability to grow together, they have found a treasure. A healthy foundation to nurture this treasure is a blend of similar values and the following:
1. Learning to love yourself first
This involves healing your own wounds and growing in your own self-awareness and consciousness. We are all in process and growing until the day we die if we choose to. This is a spiritual journey — your journey to wholeness. A relationship has a way of bringing up the unhealed wounds in us which can be positive if both people can understand and be proactive and committed to caring for themselves and the relationship.
Caring for yourself and the relationship may mean finding an excellent therapist or wellness coach who can help you process old hurts or traumas to create a new space for loving. This is such vitally important work. The healthier you are the more your chances of attracting another who is mentally healthy will be.
2. Establish Healthy Boundaries
Learning to say no and be honest is always the best policy. Speaking your truth in love is another way to say it. This takes emotional strength and knowing yourself and your preferences. The ability to ask for what you need or want is key. How else will you have a chance of having your needs met? Your partner is not a mind reader. Honoring yourself by practicing boundaries brings confidence and self-respect. Your partner will respect you more too.
If your boundaries are not respected this is a red flag so pay attention. If you feel dismissed or unheard this could indicate that the other is not present to themself, to you, or is emotionally abusive. There is a way to implement a healthy boundary with kindness and kindness should be returned.
3. Communicate Cleary
People in love want to create a stable and peaceful life together. This goes for how chores are done and bills are paid to more enjoyable topics like vacation and making important decisions or life changes. It is normal to lose one’s temper on occasion and have misunderstandings. The vital key is to know when to take responsibility and say I’m sorry and come together again. Sometimes a time out is needed.
Then it is time to wholeheartedly listen to your partner and clear up a misunderstanding. Communicate from a positive perspective giving your partner the benefit of the doubt. This must be mutual with both being truthful and honest about their needs. In this, the chances of finding compromise and common ground are promising.
4. Honor your physical relationship as a gift
Sexual expression is an important part of a healthy relationship and you should always be working to create a better sexual relationship together. That said, non-sexual touch is equally important and worth increasing in your time together. Research shows that couples who hug, kiss, snuggle, and gently touch frequently are happier overall. Humans crave healing touch and a romantic partner is an excellent person to share this type of intimacy with. One must feel emotionally safe in the relationship to have a healthy sexual relationship.
5. Have fun and spend quality time together
Life can become drudgery with too much work and no play. Know what makes your partner happy, by knowing their love language, and give it to them. ( The Five Love Languages; How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate by Gary Chapman ) Keep the spark alive with date nights and remembering special occasions. Plan adventures you both love.
Just as healthy individuals practice self-care for themself a healthy couple practices relationship-care. We all need to know we are not taken for granted and matter. Make each other laugh, and work on that bucket list. Take more care in this area if you are parents. A little special thought and creativity can go a long way.
6. Embrace Growth as an individual life path
Two people who are committed to their own growth and to their relationship have the best chance of sustaining a healthy and thriving relationship. Relationships are not easy and life is not easy, but navigating the challenges peacefully with a partner contributes greatly to our overall wellness.
Growing pains are normal and happen. Communicate open and honestly with your partner if you feel a disconnect or are struggling with your commitment. The hope would be that two committed people can grow together and their love would deepen. However, sometimes these conversations help both people realize that for their own health and personal growth, it’s best to learn how to let go. Prioritize your health and well-being, trust your intuition, and lean into your own growth.